Nic Connole's Original Poetry

Waiting

By Nic Connole

Sitting at my desk in the corner of my room,

Opening the window to let in a brisk winter night wind,

Picking up the books, bottles, and binders I had thrown across the room,

Calming my whimpering dog, frightened by my overwhelming screams,

Looking down upon my phone,

Waiting for a notification to pop up on my screen,

Hoping it’s from my mother,

Driving myself crazy the longer I wait,

Leaning back in my desk chair,

Staring up at my plain, white ceiling,

Yelling at God for why he does such terrible things to great people,

Wondering why he would allow my dad to get cancer yet another time,

Thinking the year of chemotherapy would’ve been enough to cease its advancement,

Crying until there is nothing but an empty tissue box,

Sobbing until I begin gasping for air,

Hearing the overwhelming silence that fills my empty house,

Nothing but silence,

Silence,

Peering over my shoulder to see a picture of my dad and I,

Remembering the unforgettable moments we shared together,

Hating myself for taking each one for granted,

Bottling up pure rage and anger on the inside,

Throwing my phone at the wall causing it to ricochet onto my bed,

Noticing a faint sound coming from my phone,

Realizing that someone has texted me,

Running over to the sounds of annoying Apple ring tones,

Grabbing my phone off the unmade Queen-size bed,

Reading the paragraph sent by my mother through the shattered glass screen,

Transferring the information regarding my father’s surgery to my head,

Feeling my palms perspire across the back of my phone,

Processing the details I had just been given,

Walking slowly back to my desk,

Plugging in my phone to charge for the night,

Removing my tear-filled long sleeve shirt from my trembling body,

Switching the light in my room from on to off,

Crawling into the warm sheets of my bed,

Watching my dog jump up to sleep in comfort with me,

Laying back on my soft, tempurpedic pillow,

Letting out one last sigh,

Closing my eyes,

Falling sleep,

Smiling,

Knowing that my dad, Dan Connole, is now a cancer free man.