Jordan Zapp
Process writing 2- Draft 1
September 29, 2014
Bl 6
Death by Pigeon
“Can we
have some breadsticks?” My little sister asks a man standing outside a
restaurant. He chuckles and nods. Without hesitation, Anna bolts into the
restaurant and then runs back out, her hand full of packaged breadsticks. She runs toward the square like it’s
Christmas.
“We have to
go! Hurry!” she yells back at us. My brother takes off after her. My dad rolls
his eyes. My mom suppresses a laugh. I just look up. The buildings that line the narrow streets
are brilliant, the bright colors practically shimmering in the July heat. The black box windows contrasting every
building make me wonder what may lie on the other side. As we cross a small stone bridge, a long,
black gondola passes beneath us, complete with a tall man in a red beret. He sings a beautiful song in Italian and rows
lazily down the canal. Small artisan
shops selling colorful glass pieces are stacked like blocks along the
cobblestone street, their creations catching and scattering the light. Ah,
Venice.
We had been
waiting all day to get to the square.
After touring a million museums and churches (which I enjoyed, while my
siblings loudly complained) and stopping for gelato three times (which we all
enjoyed), we could not hold in our excitement any longer. We spilled onto the square and each took in
a sharp breath of anticipation. St.
Mark’s Square, or Piazza San Marco, is the buzzing center of
Venice, Italy. Artisan shops, fancy
restaurants, gelaterias, and a huge church surround the square. Vendors set up shop anywhere they please,
and yell out to tourists, boasting the best prices. That is all well and good, but my siblings
and I have our eye on one attraction in particular: pigeons.
Hundreds
of these flying fiends flock the center of the square. These pigeons are unlike the ordinary birds
you might find in New York City. Around
us, other tourists have the right idea.
They hold breadcrumbs in their palms, arms out, and if luck is with
them, a few pigeons may land on their arms and feast on the bread. It is an honor to have a St. Mark’s pigeon
land on your arms, or at least it makes for a good story. Anyway, my siblings and I get right to it,
crushing the breadsticks in our hands and holding them out for the pigeons to
snack on. Much to our delight, several birds land on
our arms, their small talons digging into the sleeves of our shirts. They peck away at our palms, snatching up
breadcrumbs as fast as lightning.
At
first, there were two pigeons on either of my arms, then came another, and
another, and another, until birds were stacked up to my shoulders. I laughed nervously, but hey, they were just
pigeons, right? Suddenly, I feel
something land on my back, something sharp scratching my skin. Something else lands squarely on my head,
tangling itself in the only nest-like thing in all of Venice: my hair. I am overcome with them. I cannot see, and I am convinced they will
lift me off the ground and fly away. These
somethings, of course, are pigeons, but that does not stop me. They have crossed the line from adorable
pigeons to evil, I am sure of it.
“AAAAAAAAAGH!”
I let out a shriek and whip my arms around violently. All I can see are gray and white wings, in
the air, in my eyes and mouth. In a
flurry of feathers and obnoxious squawking, every vicious pigeon takes off,
hovering in the air for only a moment, before swooping down onto some other
innocent victim. I take a deep breath, they are all gone, I think. I am so wrong, so hopelessly and foolishly
wrong.
I
feel an aggressive tug on my scalp. I
yell some profanity and make another helicopter motion with my arms. The bird will not let go. It whips around, its left leg wrapped up in a
sun-stained mane of brown hair that belongs to me. Some part of me knows it is stuck, but I am
in panic mode, seeing red, and hitting at the poor thing with everything I’ve
got. By now, people are staring, laughing,
and taking pictures with their phones.
My life flashes before my eyes. This is how it ends, I think to myself, death by pigeon.
Fortunately
for me, that is not how it ends. My
mother contains her laughter long enough to step in and attempt to extricate
this stupid pigeon from my hair. When
she is successful, the deadly winged creature flies away, all too eager to find
a nice rooftop to sit on for a while.
Anna
laughs and laughs, her rambunctious shrieking echoing through the square. “Maybe,” she spits out between breaths,
“you’ll learn to brush your hair someday.” I inhale deeply, trying to recover
from the aerial attack. I slowly open my
eyes, and catch the glint of something white and glistening on top of her
head. Immediately, an evil grin spreads
across my face like a disease. I point
to her hair, smooth, shiny and super straight.
“Better
a nest than a landing strip for poop,” I smirk.
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